WHO AM I?

I enjoy being young and single. But sometimes I wonder–why don’t I have a boyfriend? Is it me? Is it guys? I’m not sure. 

I’m thankful for this new show that will tell me what it is I am doing wrong and how to finally land that man of my dreams.

sup

I think the casting producer did a really good job on this show. There’s really a wide variety of women with different kinds of problems that I can relate to. Watching the first episode, I was wondering which woman with an issue am I? If I figure this out, I can figure out how to get someone in my life who loves me for me.

Am I Natasha?

Natasha never gets noticed. Guys don’t even remember if they met her. I can relate to that. Sometimes I get so shy I just want to disappear. Her problem is that she dates “bad guys”/guys with issues so she can fix them and make that better. I think I do that too, but only as an art project. It still doesn’t lead to marriage though when the ART is done. They usually get pretty pissed.

Or maybe I am Arian.

Arian is a slut. She has slept with 100 men. This is because she used to be smart but her dad never loved her for it so she doesn’t trust men but still craves short lived intimacy via sexual exploits. I’m not sure if this is me because I’m only half way to 100 but I GET HER. 

Ok so not Arian. Maybe STASHA?

too small, goodbye

She is the BALLBUSTER. She tells men, baby ur dick is too small or u r too fat. I like her honesty but she looks kind of scary, I am not sure if this could be me. Sometimes I feel like a BALLBUSTER when I VOICE MY OPINION or DISAGREE with a guy I know but ultimately I shutup because I just want them to like me.

Abiola

losing faith ;"

Abiola seems really nice and genuine. She is just PICKY. So picky that sometimes she goes ONE YEAR without having sex. This is closer to me. I’m just a nice girl/woman/lady and I know I am smart and amazing but guys do not live up to my standards. Maybe they are intimidated by my greatness. Sometimes it gets lonely at the top though esp when I wish I had someone to pleasure me besides myself. 

Ok now we are getting close. JESSA

googlestalker

I can really relate to Jessa AKA FATAL ATTRACTION because she is a stalker. Sometimes you like/love someone SOOO much you just want to know all about them–esp who they are on THE INTERNET. A lot of times I assess men on how many hits come up for them on google, esp compared with men with the same name. And are their hits above those other men with the same name or do I have to scroll down to the very end to get to their high school soccer championship?

Also Jessa likes to text her men a lot. I understand this too. Sometimes, even though we can’t be with one another, it’s still important to let your man know you CARE via texting/twittering/facebook commenting/tagging etc. You need to let him and everyone else in ur web life KNO just how important/valuable this person is to you.

I think in the end I am 15% Natasha, 5% Stasha, 2% Arian, 20% Abiola and 48% Jessa. 

This will help me assess my problem. I have to be MORE CONFIDENT and SMILE. Be KINDER AND GENTLER. Stop SLEEPING AROUND to cure my men hangups. LOWER MY STANDARDS. And start GOOGLING MYSELF, so that I can love my own google profile, and not someone else’s.