COOL COUPLES

By BRBY | February 26, 2009

I have two pleasures in this world you guys. One is food. The other is sex. They both make me feel sooo good inside. Sometimes I feel guilty after both, but I just can’t stop. Found out about this couple somewhere and got really jealous.

we do it rite

we do it rite

It makes me feel sad that I never had a BF who would get me like that. Want to have a CRAZZY bf who will get in a burger for me. Want to pour condiments all over him and then hump his sesame seed bun.

They are cool because
1) they are crafty…they made a giant burger out of fabric
2) they are HOT… they are wearing matching spandex jumpsuits
3) they are kooky…they are not afraid to be OUT THERE with their sexual desires
4) they are REAL…the girl’s face says “hey fuck you” and the guy’s says “ha ha ha I am in this burger”

But honestly, their look is pretty 2006. I’m pretty sure the days of spandex and arts and crafts are over. Looking ahead to the future, I always look to the past to try and figure out, what will be the next COOL THING.

I wrote about these people in my dissertation. They are not afraid to be sexual/masochistic/pour foods and other liquids on eachother/beat eachother up a bit.
The next big pop duo will def pay homage to these folks. We need to get VIOLENT (but in a safe and controlled way). We need to stop spreading love and not be afraid to express our hatred towards others/ourselves. Forget absurdity. Forget kookiness. Forget trying to create a “PERSONA”. Just simply, EXPRESS.

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GIVIN IT 2 U

By BRBY | February 24, 2009

I love am app ads because they’re like hot. I feel like I could be any of those girls because they’re just “normal” girls, getting their pic taken.

I can relate to am app ads because of the lo fi quality. I feel like I could make an ad like that.
When I was hitting puberty I used to get tons of catalogs in the REAL MAIL. like delias. girlfriends. alloy. I miss them. But those girls didn’t feel REAL to me.

Sometimes we forget about another important company that makes clothes for US. Urban outfitters. I bought my first pair of high top sneakers from them. UO used to be really SAFE. They had good VALUES. But that was the old UO. The new UO is EDGY (like me). It’s PUSHING THE BOUNDARIES (like me). It’s not afraid to be RAW, NAKED, and REAL (like me).

cos uo is sexy too

cos uo is sexy too

I’m really glad UO is finally getting with the program and making images that really GRAB MY ATTENTION and make me say OMG I can’t believe they put that in there! She is like, not even wearing any clothes.

It is sad. some companies will never learn

some ppl just dont get it

some ppl just dont get it

She is “boho beat” but not BEATEN. Not gonna buy it because I can’t almost maybe kinda sorta see her tits/vagina. sorry delias. i still love you tho.

This is more like it. thank you!

yay

yay

Don’t think I’m a lezzy or anything, just like to look at other women BARING IT ALL. Sometimes I am scared to just LET GO and BE SLUTTY to get attention. Don’t believe in INNOCENCE anymore. Doesn’t make sense to cover up/wear delias clothing because it is a lie. WANT TO BE REAL. Don’t want to deny my SEXUALITY anymore. Wish I wasn’t such a fatty ;\

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WHEN I GROW UP

By BRBY | February 22, 2009

Remember when the Spice Girls were considered feminists?

be urself

be urself

I do. GIRL POWER YALL. They really inspired me to go out as a tween and not be afraid to wear platform boots, tube tops and mini skirts. I felt like a really sexy pre pubescent lady. I felt like I could conquer the world.

The Spice Girls were REAL WOMEN. They were all different. We could tell them apart via their kooky names. It helped that they had different hair colors. We could define them. We could relate with them. I liked being Sporty the best. I could really relate to her when she came clean about her anorexia and bulimia. I’m really glad she has turned her life around.

Of course, as with any great artist, there will be imitators. But the imitators have used the Spice Girls formula and left out THE REALNESS. These girls have no names. They all look the same. Only see one body type represented. I ask myself, where am I in the PUSSY CAT DOLLS?

who r u?

who r u?

Are you a pussy too?

more pussies plz

Pretty confused about these pussies yall. Don’t know who to believe. Thought I had a grasp on who the PCDs were but now I just don’t know. They’re kind of like that internet hacking group ANONYMOUS. But instead of the V for Vendetta mask they just are skinnies and wear black lingerie. It’s kind of nice. It’s like anyone can be a PCD. Wonder if they have forums where they post funny/horrific pics too. Can’t wait until the PCDs form an artsy group, or maybe they already exist?

DONT WANNA DIE JUST YET THO

DONT WANNA DIE JUST YET THO

WHEN I GROW UP I WANT TO BE FAMOUS (for my unique beauty via what Nylon says is unique)
I WANT TO BE A STAR (everyone will copy my unique beauty until it becomes mainstream)
I WANT TO BE IN MOVIES (preferably videos that appear on vimeo showcasing all my coolness)

If I was going to be a PCD, I would definitely be this one. I don’t remember when this came out on the MTVs but I think I forgot to watch TRL that week [RIP TRL :( ]
When I Grow Up from Fever Ray on Vimeo.
I would be a free spirit who covers my natural beauty with awful makeup to take a stand on the evils of cosmetics. My clothes would be artsy and hand cut/tied together and I would dance like I was on drugs in my backyard on weekends. My dad would watch me from the window and say “My little girl is gone. I don’t know who this person is anymore.” But I would be beautiful. I would be unique.

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25 THINGS TIME

By BRBY | February 16, 2009

hey everyone. so decided to jump on the BLOG/FACEBOOK/WHATEV bandwagon and just like share 25 things about me! this blog IS new and all so it would be good for yall to learn the most intimate and awkward moments that have made me, MEEEEE (and hopefully one day a meme)


1. i have like two HUGE zits on my forehead that will like NEVER go away. im getting them surgically removed in may.

2. my dad gave me a $500 allowance every month i was in college

3. i can eat myself out…no like seriously

4. ive given head to 36 guys but only had sex with 3

5. in 11th grade i was the lead in our school’s production of OUR TOWN

6. i once had sex in a bathroom stall–you can see it on the cobrasnake circa 2006

7. i am a recovering anorexic/bulimic/agoraphobic/alcoholic/pedophile/high school musical lover

8. WHEN I GROW UP I WANT TO BE FAMOUS. I WANT TO BE A STAR. I WANT TO BE IN MOVIES. 

9. i’m getting my PhD in Creative Visual Studies and Applications of Public Spaces

10. i am a former raver/grunge rocker/indie lover/lillith fair lezzy

11. my dad divorced my mom for my highschool bffaeaeaea

12. on average i use my vibrator about 20 times a week, but not always to pleasure myself 

13. ive only had anal sex once and i was really young and impressionable and loved him like alot and i was catholic anyways so it wasnt even sex and jesus like never saw it. im tot still a virgin

14. in highschool i was voted most likely to die from overdose….in college it ALMOST came true

15. i dated tay zonday before he was a meme/microfamer

16. i hate to be naked/stare at my body so i dont even shower naked. i take one pants leg off at a time so i can at least keep the other one on. this allows me not to vomit while i clean my body. i also try to lay wash rags over one breast at a time so am not reminded of my hideousness

17. i started this blog so that i could get lots of advertisers and critical acclaim and make loads of money and never have to worry about ACTUALLY working again. 

18. my dream is to marry a rich…(well not ibanker anymore) software/web/merging technologies developer (a la the fat steve jobs, skinny steve is grrooosss) and to bear all of his children so i can stay home and relieve my childhood by jazzercizing and baking cookies.

19. my first lesbian experience was in college with my tennis coach who after a long set grabbed my tits and then ran away. i was only mildly turned on. 

20. im feeling guilty for not including pictures/videos/links in this post but i feel like it would ruin the FLOW/REALITY of these 25 things

21. when i was 10 my mom sent me to fat camp so i could be hot, but i just hadnt hit puberty yet. hated my fat boobs. still hate them. still on liquid diet.

22. in middle school i went to a NKOTB concert and threw my bra at jordan mcknight

23. THIS BLOG IS REAL. ITS THE REALEST THING IVE EVER DONE. jk its a total lie

24. on the first season of the pickup artist, i was one of those girls in the club the dorks try to hit on. i had no idea there were cameras and everything that happened was REAL. i was given lots of IOIs and HPVs STDs etc

25. i currently dont have any girlfriends who DONT have HPV. GET THE VACCINE YALL!!!!

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FEEL SO ALONE

By BRBY | February 1, 2009

{photo via am app}

all ive ever wanted is to feel BOOTYFUL. i thought if i felt BOOTYFUL then i would have lots of bffs and bfs and like TONS of gfs and i wouldnt feel so alone like i do, right now. i use 2 want ppl to luv me via my butt. i did not want to WORK OUT to attain this butt. jus think it is OK to that i used PHTSHP.

now i am OLDER and WISER. cant help but think the key to life/happiness/sex/food/love/eat/drink/man/woman is to luv ur butt–dont PHTSHP it. I AM BRBY AND I LOVE MY BUTT. I AM BRBY AND I LOVE MY BUTT. I AM BRBY AND I LOVE MY BUTT.

need ppl to know that i luv myself just the way i am/am confident/do not care about ways mainstream media tries 2 make me feel bout my body (sooo above it). i hope that when someone uses my bathroom (aka the most intimate/secretive rooms in our houses/dorms/apts) to BREAK THE SEAL, vomit or jus check their hair/tits/makeup, they will look around and know that i am ME via the products i surround myself with. i am SECURE.

I’m interested in outfitting my bathroom with products that SUPPORT ME. BODY WASH that will never LET ME DOWN.  a shampoo that luvs me FOR WHO I AM. do not need to conform. I just need to RINSE LATHER N REPEAT.

photo from dove yall REAL WOMEN

photo from dove yall REAL WOMEN

altho honestly i miss it when shampoo would give me orgasm
miss u herbal essences. do not need man. do not need vibrator. only need shampoo

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BLOGGING MAKES SENSE

By BRBY | February 1, 2009

to me
because i really feel like i need a way to LET IT ALL OUT. i feel like i have so much to say, share and show the world. i just want to GIVE.

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